Crimson Peak and ghosts galore

I’ve had a full weekend, pretty much on purpose, it’s one of those times where you go: “I don’t wanna stop and be in my own brain for a second right now”. The yearly, and constantly growing Spökvandringen in Skara ( a walk with drama students scaring the sh*t out of you), so big this year they had to turn people down for the first time due to full groups.

Then Saturday I worked a 12 hour shift, combining it with my virgin journey to Ullared (big, cheap, famous mall/market) and dear God, people go there by their own free will? It should be used as crime punishment! Especially if the criminal has social/agora phobia. It’d be ruthless.

Sunday was Crimson Peak. Watch worthy. Not scary in the uberscary sense. The last time a film really scared me was “The Conjuring” in 2013. But interesting. And hey, you can’t go wrong casting yum Tom Hiddleston.

Why the mundande details of my weekend? Because it proved effective to get me going musically today. In “don’t think” mode you are less hesitant and procrastinating. And while I usually write the chords of a song before I write the riff (how to play the chords) which is a bit more time consuming, the piano basically played itself here, I was just aiding with hands. Somewhere around 30-40 minutes of recording, which is unusually little, at least for me.

‘Gonna be fun to see what you think of it when I’m done! 🙂

Oh, by the way, October 21st 2015 is coming up! Time for us to dress in funny metal hats and get on our hoverboards! Now, where did I put mine?…

future crimson-peak-poster

Human kindness

On my way home from non-music work I stopped at a local store to get some boring grocery shopping done, even rockstars have to do things ordinary humans do… 😛

Anyway, I saw a woman going through the trash outside the store looking for bottles and cans to pawn. For those of you living in countries without this system; in Sweden you get money, and there are pawn machines in every grocery store, if you return bottles and cans. Not a lot, but enough to make some return their bottles and not waste. Some still throw them away, bad for the environment or not. And some who are low on money go to public trash to find these bottles and cans. This woman struck out, nothing there, I could see it, so I just put my groceries in the car and gave her my empty bottle from the Festis (soft drink) I’d been drinking at work. It’s worth 1 SEK (consult your local exchange office for how small of an amount that actually is). She got tears in her eyes from this tiny gesture. I also had a short conversation with her as I was walking to my car to drive home, and her face just lit up. It wasn’t much. Heck, to me it was nothing, I did not do anything big to help her at all, and to her it was everything.

That’s why I get so confused today when people start arguing about wether we should help refugees or not. “We should put our efforts towards our own!”. And I’m like; what effort? If you count basic human kindness as an effort, then maybe you should just concentrate on one thing. But it really takes so super little to help. The romani throw kisses at me when I walk by them because I sacrifice my small change every now and then, and they recognize me. They are happy and grateful, and I feel like what I’ve done is just… meh… I help everywhere I can, with like minimal effort and minimal money, and still I get told I’ve done so much. So really… effort? Rephrase or concentrate on that one thing yourself then, but I think it’s so dead off.

I do feel human kindness has grown three heart sizes of late, what with Syria and everything. I see people change for the better and developing their empathy further left and right. I know mine’s grown too. But there are still those wet blankets all over, almost violently resisting. Strange. Anyways, I’m inspired to work on a new album while finishing off the promotion for this year’s, and I think it’s going to be influenced a lot by this topic. Re-writing a lot of old political songs that all of a sudden are relevant again.

In the meantime, have some boobs! 😀

(Pattern for this year’s breast cancer awareness on an Ica shopping bag, and aren’t you disappointed?)

It’s going to rain -today-

And when it rains it pours. Song ready. Video ready.

Plus some pics of them keys taken with the good camera as promised.

And in addition, a few pics from the gig!
Anyway, short about the gig; it went great, even though we had to mic up the keyboard, we played so tight I almost thought we were robots til I hit a bass tone a bit wrong 😉 And when we got home little Skara gave us a super purrdy aurora borealis, which I haven’t seen since I was a kid (and don’t remember well I might add). You almost got the feeling the atmosphere wanted to give a good show back. Yes, sometimes artists get hubris. Beautiful sky either way.

Music Video
The video is filmed during the first two hours of the day, where at the moment, my anxiety levels peak. I don’t always have anxiety problems, in fact, I can go months without them. And when I do have them like now, they’re usually at short time of the day, as mentioned, mornings are the problem. I’m describing this stuff even though it’s personal because I want you to know that a) it’s possible to get to a level where you can handle these problems if you have them, and maybe even one day be rid of them completely b)lose the mental illness stigma. This is what it looks like. Flickering eyes, looking like the person is a second from crying. Sometimes crying. That’s all. Don’t be scared of it.

I’m confident I’ll be rid of them completely one day. Until then, I wanna show you that there’s nothing to fear, nothing strange, we don’t become giant ogers who try to pull you down. And it’s normal. And people have it. And you might have it and identify with it, and that’s always a good feeling that automatically helps you feel just a little bit better.

No make up. No filters. I even upped the contrast so my skin flaws would show on camera. Another attempt at the whole “dare to show reality” thing.

Hope you enjoy. I ended up doing something completely different than what I talked about in the beginning, as you might have suspected 😉

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Rehearsals and cinnamon buns

The cinnamon bun is a big deal in Sweden. So big we have a day for it, October 4th. I was very naughty and didn’t have one yesterday, so the break treat at rehearsals was pretty much a given. I bought something that was a mix between a Danish and a cinnamon bun, though, quite a brilliant combo I must say, delish!

Drummer showed us how high tech the rehearsal space has gotten. You can shut down everything in the room with a remote! Pretty cool. Except he didn’t realize he turned the coffee maker on when the lights went on again, so when he started to make coffee I had to take shelter, as it was trying to spit hot water on me. It’s a pink coffee maker, leading me to the only possible conclusion that pink things are dangerous.

Oh, my brilliant idea, you haven’t heard? You know when you dream, you get visions, sometimes so great you have to write them down? Well, I did just that, woke up, shouted it out and wrote it down. I took a look at my notes when fully awake. “Grape babies”. My brain is a disturbed one indeed…


Sunday mix

The Music and Business weekends are always inspiring. Particularly today as I finally got it confirmed; I won the kazoo battle! We’re always asked to play stuff and I was like; I have absolutely nothing in check on the Randy Newman mix yet, I have nothing to show. “Then play something already out there”. “OK, Sand Box. It’s gonna be a video soon, and I just wanna know, was I not right in claiming my kazoo track?” See, the mixing technician is one of those rare creatures who hates the awesome instrument kazoo. We always need more kazoo, in my opinion, it’s like cowbell. So he mixed it way too low in the beginning, and I was like: “Noooo! I made harmonies and everything, raise it up, through the roof!” We ended up on a level that made me happy and the mixing technician very sad. As we listened today, the consensus was; Heck, it could have been louder. I won, I WON!! Ha haa! I already knew I won, but it’s nice to get confirmation.

And as we discussed how we sometimes have to let go to find the answer, I did that today, and I found the solution of what’s been bothering me in the Newman mix, I can put my heavy “Art of Mixing” book down for a while although it’s always a good read.


It’s my sh**, it’s my gig

I’ll see you next wednesday, trying to break a world record! 🙂

I’m proud ‘coz it’s one of the first gigs that made me all bitchy and telling people off! I had signed up in June, yet the arranger went: “oh, we can’t fit you in!” and I went: “heeeell no, you ain’t bumping me, I signed up in JUNE!! Tell me if all the other bands did!”

And I got my slot. Well done, assertive me! Probably not surfacing for another while…